Fall is my favorite time of year. It’s the time when everyone settles in to the changing season and starts to embrace a more structured, and perhaps quieter lifestyle. This is evident with the children as well. Students are settling into the structure of the school day and adapting to the rhythm of the classroom while establishing relationships with their teachers and peers.
I love witnessing this time of transition and growth. I find it can be a good time to pause, reflect, and listen to your children. Are they talking about school? What are they saying? Are they talking about their peers? Are their words kind and supportive? Are they curious? Or are they repeating possibly unkind words that they have heard others say?
It’s normal for there to be some uncertainty and unease as humans come together in new groupings and are asked to try new things. This uncertainty can show itself in a variety of ways. It’s important to pay attention and listen to what you are hearing, or not hearing, from your children and to engage in conversations about diversity, equity, and inclusion.
If you do hear something that is surprising, or not kind, get curious. Ask them questions. It can be hard or even alarming to hear your child say something negative about others, but instead of getting upset, use it as an opportunity to learn and grow together with your child.
If you are unsure of how to respond when this occurs, don’t worry here are some suggestions and resources to get you started:
Focus on Strengths
Encourage your children to explore their strengths and those of their classmates. Discuss how everyone has different talents and abilities.
Use a Relaxed Atmosphere
Choose a calm, quiet time to talk, and even do an activity together as you have this conversation.
Use Language of Inclusion
Emphasize that everyone is unique and that it is important to understand and respect differences.
Read Books and Watch Media Together
Read books or watch documentaries or movies that highlight and celebrate diversity. This can help your child learn about the world and start conversations about being different. Here are two to start you off:
- The Reason I Jump by Naoki Higashida, is a beautiful book and movie that shares the inner voice of a 13 year old boy with Autism.
- The Invisible Boy by Patrice Barton, is a wonderful picture book about how small acts of kindness can turn an invisible boy into a friend.
Discuss Fairness
Explain that being fair doesn’t mean treating everyone the same. Reading books from the following list can help bring up some great talking points:
- Separate is Never Equal, Sylvia Mendez and her Family’s fight for Desegregation
- Baseball Saved Us by Ken Mochizuki
- One Grain of Rice, A Mathematical Folktale
- New Shoes, by Susan Lynn Meyer